Let’s face it, no one wants to get stuck doing the dishes every night while their partner goes into the living room to watch television.
How often do they clean the bathroom? How often do you pull the weeds in the front yard?
Surprisingly, household duties can become a source of conflict in relationships when they aren’t discussed.
Some people naturally gravitate toward certain household responsibilities. Others avoid certain ones at all costs.
Like anything else, it’s important to communicate about who will do what in your relationship when you’re living together. When you can split household duties, you can keep the peace and make sure everything gets done the way it’s supposed to.
Here’s how can you split household duties the right way.
Decide What You Like to Do
Again, some people just gravitate toward certain chores and responsibilities. Do you love yard work? Make it your responsibility to mow the lawn each week. Does your partner find some relaxation in folding laundry? Let them take the reigns on it.
Talk about the chores each of you enjoy doing, and then talk about the things you absolutely hate doing. Chances are, you’ll be able to compromise on most things.
Plus, even if you get “stuck” doing something you don’t like, it can give you the motivation to get it done quickly. You might even find a way to make it more enjoyable for yourself.
Don’t Count the Chores
While it’s okay to make a list of who takes on which responsibility, that list doesn’t have to be even. When you split household duties, it doesn’t need to be a direct split down the middle.
If you end up taking on more than your partner, you shouldn’t hold that against them. There are so many factors to consider—schedules, the time it takes to do certain things, etc.
As long as the duties of the home are getting done and both partners are involved, it shouldn’t matter if one has a couple more additions to their list than the other. It’s not a competition; you’re on the same team!
Let Go of Your Way of Doing Things
No two people do things the exact same way. In some relationships, that can cause problems when it comes to splitting household duties. Unfortunately, that often leaves one person with the majority of the responsibilities, because they’re unable to “let go” of the way they want things done.
Maybe your partner doesn’t fold towels the way you usually do it. Maybe they don’t wipe the counters using the “right” cleaner. In order to split household duties, you’re going to have to let go of being right all the time in the way you do things. Just because your partner does something differently doesn’t make it wrong.
When you loosen the reigns a bit, it becomes easier to divide duties peacefully. You can express to your partner how you might like something to be done, but don’t take it personally when they do it their own way.
Be willing to be flexible when it comes to which duties you can let go of, and how your partner handles them. As long as it’s getting done, that’s what counts.
If you’re having trouble splitting the responsibilities in your home, and you live in the San Francisco Bay Area, feel free to contact me. Or, visit here [insert specialty page link] to learn more.
Together, we can work on practical ways to split household duties without contention, so you can keep the peace in your household. Plus, you can find more fulfillment in taking care of your responsibilities as a couple.