There’s an old saying that goes, “love knows no age.” If you’re in an age gap relationship, you’ve probably repeated that to yourself more than once.
Unfortunately, there are still a lot of stereotypes and stigmas surrounding relationships where there is a big age gap. On top of that, there are things to consider within your relationship, too.
Couples in an age gap relationship will likely experience different struggles that people of similar ages don’t have to deal with. How you handle those struggles, as well as dealing with the opinions of others, can make or break your relationship.
So, what are the biggest keys to managing an age gap relationship?
Ward Off Judgement
Again, you might be judged when you’re in an age gap relationship. It could even come from your closest family members or friends. Even if people have good intentions when they’re telling you what’s wrong with your relationship, it’s never easy to hear.
Understand that when you enter into a relationship like this, people might think they have the right to say something. That can take a toll on any relationship. To counter these negative outside forces, it’s important for you and your partner to have a firm foundation with one another.
One way to combat this is to be completely upfront with your family, friends, etc. Tell them why you’re in this relationship and why it’s so important to you. If you simply ignore what people are saying and don’t respond, it can look like you’re trying to hide or that you’re ashamed of your relationship.
While you don’t need to accept people’s judgments, you should be willing to stand up for your relationship when people cast judgment. Make a commitment with your partner to do defend your relationship. If you do, it will be easier to remain strong as a couple through those judging words and opinions.
Talk About Your Future
Depending on the age gap between you and your partner, one of the things you might struggle with is how to plan for your future. It’s something you should talk about early on in your relationship.
One of you might want kids while the other might be in a place in life where they feel they’re too old. Your views on finances could be different as well. Or, you might be worried about how things will change if the older partner’s health declines, etc.
This isn’t typically a fun conversation to have, but it’s necessary to make sure that you’re both on the same page. It will keep you from arguing about similar topics in the future.
Don’t Play Into Age Stereotypes
It’s very important to remain true to yourself when you’re in an age gap relationship. If you’re the younger person in the relationship, don’t expect your older partner to take care of everything. If you’re the older person, don’t act like you know everything by treating your partner like a child.
This is a common problem when there is a wide age gap. While you may not be able to help your natural personality that has changed over time, don’t use age as a way to change who you are in your relationship.
It’s important to understand that there are many different struggles that can occur in an age gap relationship. But, that doesn’t mean you’re doomed from the start. If you’re new to an age gap relationship and you’re in the San Francisco Bay Area, feel free to contact me.
Together, we can work on even more ways to manage your relationship, and stop worrying about the potential judgments of others.